The week atrted with the amazing news that led to the Euphoria post. What can top that for the beginning of a week?

Attended two sessions at the Wellspring centre. The first has to do with Brain Fog, the second Q-Gong.

Brain Fog

It turns out that Brain Fog is not restricted to chemo patients. We all have suffered from this condition at one time or another. You go to another room to get something, but forget what it was as soon as you enter the other room. Chemo patients seem to suffer from this condition with a slight variance, we don’t even know why we changed rooms.

The first session was geared to be an introduction of sorts, explaining what is yet to come. People talked about what they are going through. Nothing dramatic or surprising. Forgetting why you went to the store. Make a list. I did, then forgot where I put the list. I forgot about an appointment. Looked at the calendar three or four times and still forgot. Multitasking – what a joke. Can barely juggle one even let alone try to handle more. And the list goes on.

We will be doing exercises that will help us remember. Games and strategies. Word associations, and lots more.


Fascinating. This is the mother of Tait-chi and similar exercise routines that have been developed over the years. Another discipline that tries to make you aware of your breath. we were taught how to breathe as it is the backbone of the other exercises. Through the stomach, not the chest. Breathe in through the nose, out through the mouth. We had to put our hands on our stomach to make sure it was rising and falling. The instructions got slightly more risky, at least for me. We had to push in on the stomach to expel the bad chi through our back. This is a bit problematic for someone who has had his insides cut up. At one point, the moderator decided I needed help with the pushing of the stomach. I had to stop her. Why she asks, that is the location of my operation, says I. Ah, she backed off right away and told the class to not do anything that would hurt them.

We also did an energy test of sorts. You put you hands out in front of and cross them at your wrists. She then attempts to push down your hands and you resist. Hands stay up. Someone stands behind the first participant and gives the person a thumbs down over their head. The same exercise leads to little resistance as the hands collapse. She asked me to volunteer, which somehow defeats the notion of volunteering, methinks. I stood up and extended my arms are instructed. She pushed my arms down with great ease. Turns out the thumbs down saps the energy from everyone inthe room. Bizarre to say the least. Doing a thumbs up reverses the process. I guess this means we have to enter rooms and give the place an immediate thumbs up to increase the energy level. Will have to try that.

All the exercises were terrific. I just have to discipline myself to do them regularly while at home. Working on it.

Other things

I am reading a bit more. The week was high in energy for me. No chemo, or anything else. Felt very strong, but was still exhausted by the afternoon. A bit strange. Just have to adjust. I think I maybe push myself a bit harder when I am feeling well resulting in the fatigue. No worries.

Went shopping, mostly for food and stuff. All good.

Surprise! We get Avastin today. Dr. Hedley feels that enough time has gone by for me to have healed. Damn the creation of blood vessels. Full steam ahead.

We searched the web for the side effects of Avastin. It includes just about anything that is not included with the other drugs. name it, and it is a side effect. All of it includes an emergency visit to your doctor or the emergency room.

Chemo Brain is setting in. What do you want for dinner, she says. That takes way too much thinking. I literally sat there looking at Janet wondering why she is asking me that question. What do I want? The answer stopped at the question. Too much. You decide, Whatever you make is fine.

Chemo Tired is also setting in. Cannot be helped. I have to stay awake since my brother is coming in tonight. He should be here in a couple of hours. Chemo tired just means you put your head down and snooze whenever and where ever.

The Avastin was a bit of a surprise. I thought they might put it off till after the CT-Scan. It threw me for a loop. Again the unexpected. The surprise move. The unknown. A bit silly really after all this time. Yeah 2 months and a bit make for all this time. Still, we are becoming veterans. The nurses are beginning to know us. A club.

Went in for blood work in the morning so we would have the latest possible results. Missing chemo last week upset janet and Judith a lot. Ruth put a positive spin on it. Imagine what havoc the chemo is wreaking on the cancer cells if it has that knd of effect on the white blood cells. Not sure I understand the correlation, but it pacified Janet. Good thing.

Went in this morning. They took my blood. Left the thumb tack in my chest. Now we wait for the results. My white blood cell count which had taken a dive over the past four weeks has rebounded to 3.9. The number means we are safe for chemo. Had o wait two hours to be let in. Left the club room at 5:00. Late. Dark outside.

A bit nauseous. Nothing my amazing pills won’t solve. But only if it is nausea. Have a hard time telling.

This too shall pass. We will survive and move on.

© 2010 I Have Cancer Suffusion theme by Sayontan Sinha