My opiate naive body reacts to yet another drug.

Half a pill is all I am supposed to take, and it is all I took. About an hour before going to sleep. I decided to also listen to Jacquie Gardner’s meditation CD on mindful breathing. It helped me a lot in the hospital.

My leg jumps when I try to sleep. I Googled it under leg jumping or leg jiggling. It only happens after I have been lying in bed for about half-an-hour trying to sleep. I guess the body is telling me that I have run out of time. I usually get up and take a walk. Maybe eat something lite, and try to sleep again. This process may repeat itself several times until I finally pass out.

The drug started showing its colours pretty early. It is supposed to take effect in about an hour, but it does so a lot earlier. I feel all my limbs becoming heavier. No chance of any leg jumping, they were just too heavy. I fell asleep only to wake up an hour later. Janet has come to bed by now to keep me company. I go to the washroom barely able to open my eyes. I figure this is a good thing. But I am wide awake once back in bed.

Things take a twist. My arms start twitching like mad. I have a hard time explaining what happened. I appear to have something wiggling under my skin. My arms twitched and itched and jumped, totally out of control. Took between 5 and 10 minutes for the body to calm down. I started laughing. What else can you do? How allergic will I be to the drugs I am to take today before going to chemo?

I go down and watch television for a couple of hours. Back in bed around midnight. Fall asleep immediately. Wake up at 6 in the morning. Holly Molly! 6 hours of continuous sleep without a bathroom break. We will have to try this again.

Side effects of the drug are listed as:

  • memory loss
  • confusion
  • drowsiness or dizzziness
  • affect your appetite

Wikipedia has a sightly different selection of side effects. I think my reacton would be isted under paradoxical effects.

In answer to my cousin Ruja, the extra drugs are all pills. Actually 7 of them to take an hour before chemo starts. The chemo itself is a two drug present. I have the names somewhere, maybe in tomorrow’s post. Both will be connected to the Porta-Cath in my chest. The first is administered in the hospital where they will supervise me. The second is a 48 hour infusion for which I go home. Chemo starts today at 2:30.

I will of course, post on that as soon as I can.

2 Responses to “Lorazepam – The Morning After”

  1. Hi Farokh,

    Ignacio sent me the link to your blog yesterday and I read it all, from the start to this latest entry. Quel témoignage incroyable! Je te remercie de partager tes pensées avec nous.
    Also, I just wanted to tell you that I went to the Mindfulness Centre last night for a 2 hour guided meditation and I directed all my thoughts and energy your way. Bonne chance avec la chimio et je continuerai de penser à toi.

  2. Imagining what it would look like if you were hostile with psychomotor agitation (paradoxical effects). That is IMPOSSIBLE. It would be like Obama having a hissy fit.

    Which I guess is the definition of Paradoxical:

    a statement or proposition that seems self-contradictory or absurd but in reality expresses a possible truth.

    Hopefully your doctors didn’t go the to Wiki Med School.

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