As you may or may not know by now, we spent a weekend at the Fraser farm in Caledon, about an hour north of Toronto. They were not there. They gave us the key to the house. We have been there many times and are not strangers to the house.

This is not your typical farm, more of a gentleman’s farm. Nice large property, some of which has been leased to a local farmer who is raising cows. The house is spectacular, decorated with great taste. It is divided in two sections, the old original farmhouse, and the new addition that was there before the Frasers took over. The brickwork between the two section almost match. The new ones being, well, new, while the old show the ravages of time.

We have always stayed in the new section, in what is ostensibly the TV room. This is very practical, specially now, because we have our very own bathroom, a must for my condition.

I was incredibly tired for the whole weekend. Janet surmised that my white blood cell count was probably low. We had our last chemo session just 10 days after the previous one. We moved up the date of the sessions by a couple of days. I do not know why I ever doubt her judgment.  I did not think two days would make that much of a difference.

I pushed myself as I always appear to be doing. We went into Orangeville, which is a strange town, even for a country setting. A mixture of good and atrocious. Their main street is called Broadway, and it is that. Very broad. They have built a median in the middle that effectively separates one side from the other. The only places to cross is at intersections. They really should get rid of the median and let the two sides communicate. There are all kinds of possibilities there. All that is required is a little bit of vision.

We walked around town a bit. Found a delightful store selling household decorations, and jewelery and other stuff. A real mish-mash as you usually find in the country.  We were looking around and purchased a couple of items. I was flirting with the very young sales ladies. What else am I supposed to do while Janet is shopping?  I usually take pictures, but these girls flirted back.

One of them asked where we are from, and more specifically where in Toronto. Oh my, says one, I teach at the Riverdale Pilates once in a while. Good friends with one of the trainers there. Turns out the trainer is Janet’s personal trainer. Small world.

We went into town several times for groceries, or to just look around a bit more. I drove around looking for picture taking opportunities. None to be had. I also dove around the Fraser’s neighbourhood to see what there was. Lots of pictures there. Also took pictures of their barn which is going to be repaired before it collapses. Can’t have that, the cows live in the basement. You will see some of the pictures once I have looked at them a couple of thousand times.

We rested a lot. Talked, they cooked, I ate, talked some more. Watched a bit of TV, slept a lot. I am waking up really early these days, around 6:30. Not sure why, don’t really care. I can always sleep later. I wrote a couple of poems, the first of which I put on the blog. Designed a camera bag that I hope to produce. Going out this week to buy a sewing machine. Yes, I know how to use one. Watched my mother over so many years.

The weather was almost perfect. Hot in the day, specially in the sun, cool at nights. Stormy on our last day there. It was good.

My exhaustion was tiring to say the least. I was looking forward to walking a lot more. They have a large pond on the property. Always a good walk around. But not this time.

No weekend would be complete without an accident with the bag. I emptied it at around 3:00AM. Fell back asleep around 6. Woke up with start at 8:00 when my hand drifted into something gooey and wet and stinky. The bag had filled to capacity and burst at he seams. Stuff everywhere. Could not be controlled. All over the floor. All the way to the washroom where I started cleaning up while Janet cleaned up the sheets and floor and everything else. Embarrassing to have her do that. I know, that is what marriage is all about. Still, it is a messy proposition.

I tried to not let that ruin the weekend, difficult as it is. It just helps remind me of the fragility of the situation.

Overall, a good weekend. A good dry run for our trip to New York on the 20th.

Back to chemo daycare after an extra week off to celebrate the Baha’i New Year. That was on March 25. A very uneventful day as all visits to the Chemo Daycare unit are turning into.

The nurse showed up as promised. I had the pleasure of seeing Natalie again. Unplugged in no time. No fuss no muss as they say, though again I have no idea where the expression originates from. Muss is defined in the dictionary as: a state of disorder; muddle. I guess that would explain the expression, but who comes up with these?

The fatigue that set after the chemo is a whole other story. Janet tells me it is normal. I doubt it. I was virtually in bed for what seemed like forever. I would run one errand and retire to recover. I was finally out of bed and doing things on Thursday. What a relief. Kali joined me for coffee on Friday. We got to sit in the park.

A fabulous coffee house has opened around the corner from our house called The Rooster. Great coffee, lovely people and always packed. We bought our stuff and went across the street to enjoy the food, company and conversation. Kali is very well informed about the stuff Ronak Shah is talking about. Made for an interesting afternoon. Maybe once I have digested the information, I will talk about it a bit more. Fetneh also had an opinion. Makes for an interesting conversation.

Friday evening saw us in emergency at the Toronto General Hospital.

I am beginning to think it to be futile to imagine for a second that a normal existence of any kind is possible. Just as you start to relax and start a routine, something falls apart. In this case, I started experience a lot of discomfort in the stomach area to the right of the stoma. This was accompanied by a full day of no activity from the stomach. A bit disconcerting.

A doctor named Hodges looked after us. He actually had the temerity to read my chart and remember what he had read. He was very comforting and well informed about the situation. We did an stomach Xray to see if there was anything blocking the passage. Turns out that blockage of the passage is a definite possibility following operations such as mine. Not just now but essentially for ever. I keep hearing the for ever mantra over and over again. Have to start paying more attention, and come to some sort of understanding of “for ever”.

No obstruction, just stool being stubborn. Lost their way and are hunkering down for the long haul. Nothing some industrial strength Drano would not solve. I was prescribed something called Lactulose, which is over the counter. I have to take 2 tablespoons of this stuff up to four times a day. Makes ExLAx look like a glass of water. My bag floweth over. No really. Literally. Damn thing blew apart spilling its vile content. All I could do was make my way to the washroom to clean things up trying to contain the spillover. Life is nothing short of exciting. The only question I have is when do you know the system is back to normal? I guess I have to wait and see if the stomach pains return or not.

I was very upset yesterday. Mad as hell. How dare my body betray me like this? This is my one good week. The least it could is let me enjoy it. I now have to be careful for  a few days waiting for this to pass.

One more item to add to our list of stuff to watch out for.

And one more: The skin around the stoma has turned black. Not sure if it is because of the trauma it is going through or something to be really worried about. I have written to the wonderful Dr Kennedy, my surgeon for clarification. I am going to see her next Tuesday anyways. It would be nice to have some sort of clarification before that.

I have been in great spirits until yesterday, when my bag did the spilling over scene. Yesterday was not a good day, spiritually, nor physically, I guess.

Today is already better. Gita is supposed to join me for coffee. I might go to her place just for a change of scenery.

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